Tomorrow is the 11th of July and we will be celebrating 11 months of marital bliss. To be honest, for the most part it has been just that. The general consensus about the first year of marriage is: it's hard. You have to get used to living together and other such tribulations. If that's true for most people, then God has given us a special dispensation of grace because the first almost-11 months have been awesome. Not without its moments, though. For example, the last major catastrophe we went through in our marriage involved Paul going camping/hiking/shooting stuff with his buddies over the Fourth of July while Kate watched a lame fireworks display with a few friends (something she shall never do without Paul again). If by now you couldn't tell who is writing this, then perhaps the previous statement gave it away.
From the first moment that Paul told me about this trip, I was categorically against it. End of conversation. Now that is not a very helpful attitude to have in marriage. Only sin is worthy of that kind of rigid opposition. That is, if sin was worthy of something. I ended up using logic and reasoning (and some tears) to convince Paul that him going would be detrimental to our family, when, in reality, he was just getting in the way of what I wanted. And what I wanted was to not have to spend time apart from him, especially around a holiday, especially when I had time off from work, especially not in the first year of marriage and so on. But Paul, the gem that he is, patiently took all this into account and decided not to go, even though the friend that invited him was leaving the country for an internship soon after the trip. I was happy about that and Paul... well he was joyfully and sacrificially serving me. I had not even given this decision another thought, until I mentioned it to a friend, which was both the biggest mistake and the best thing I've ever done. After hearing all of my justified reasons, she, in turn, used logic and reasoning to convince me that he needed to go and that I should let him. So I did. And the time apart was good. Hard, but good. The hardest part was not even being apart but rather trusting God. We both had to lean on God in a way that we didn't really feel necessary when around each other. I learned a great deal about trusting God for Paul's safety and survival. I mean he was living on dried fruit all week.
Maybe we're wimps who can't spend a few days apart, but whatever. We are certain that God wanted to use this time to answer our longstanding prayer about being closer to him. If this is the way God wanted to do it, then we rejoice because we are so excited about the end result: being perfected into the likeness of Christ. Whatever means You want to use, God, no matter how hard it will be, do it. We know You are good. Thank You for the good gift of marriage.
(A view from Paul's backpacking trip)
